Sloan Johnson is a zamboni-driving, hockey-loving parent of two kids who are pretty okay most of the time.

When they were three, their parents received a call from the principal asking them to pick Sloan up from school. Apparently, if you aren’t enrolled, you can’t attend classes, even in Kindergarten. The next week, they were in preschool and started plotting their first story soon after.

Later in life, their parents needed to do something to help the socially awkward, uncoordinated child come out of their shell and figured there was no better place than a bar on Wednesday nights. It’s a good thing they did because this is where they found their love of reading and writing. Who needs socialization when you can sit alone in your bedroom with a good book?

Sloan’s been kicked out of the PTA in three school districts and is no longer asked to help with fundraisers because they’ve been known get lost in a good book and forget they have somewhere to be.